Look what's inside

I like to know precisely what's in my food.

This is why I rarely eat out or buy food from cafes; I can't tell what's been added. I've no idea if the chef has added a load of olive oil or fried the ingredients in butter or added piles of fat. Not knowing what's in my food scares me a little sometimes.

I even have it with my mum's cooking. I'm travelling most of the length of the country and, rather than do it in one go, I'm staying at my parent's house tonight. My mum will be cooking dinner. She's a very good cook and is usually on a diet, so I know that what I'll be eating will be a healthy mixture of fresh ingredients. But I hate the fact that I don't know exactly what's in there in what proportions.

When I'm out somewhere and buy food, I would rather choose a less healthy option that comes with nutritional information and an ingredients list on the side, than buy something that looks all natural and good for me.

I've learned to cope with this fear. I will go out for dinner and not spend an hour pouring over the menu trying to decide which is the least fattening option. I will enjoy an item of food that doesn't say in clear numbers what it contains.

But in some ways, I feel like those people who have to overcome arachnophobia by being made to look at spiders, then handle them, then eventually pick up a tarantulla. I can control my fear of unknown foods well enough in normal circumstances, but I think I'm a long way from being ready for the tarantulla.